Maybe it's too much.

Sure, rehearsals are only 3-4 (sometimes 5) hours a day... every day, and sure we get the whole morning/afternoon to live our lives. That's all fine- but the outside commitment is outrageous. To learn an entire script, entire songs, all the right notes, and memorize all the blocking in three weeks (and in my case, while going to school) is intense. It leaves little time for fun things like pumpkin carving, University football games, and visiting family- and of course, that sucks. So in my spare time, I'm punching out papers, napping, memorizing all of my stuff, searching for costumes at countless stores in town, trying to remember to eat, trying to enjoy the process, and ripping my hair out. I'm just busy, that's all. I mean hell, I haven't blogged really at all in the past two weeks. I ALWAYS find time to blog

Carousel, again.

UPDATE UPDATE: My director has YET to be an asshole to me! WOOO HOO. We've been doing music and working mostly with the accompanist while he watches... and he's yet to tell me I suck! Awesome! ... Last night was the first night we actually worked a scene. I was scared out of my freaking mind that he was going to absolutely tear me to shreds- but it was all fine.

I enjoy the direction he gives. I think I'll learn a lot from him by the time this is all over and done with. He didn't direct me really, at all. He directed everyone around me. I've yet to discern, in any show, whether it's a good thing or not when the director doesn't criticize or direct you. Either I am doing exactly what he wants, or he's not paying attention to me. At any rate he's not being a jerk- which I appreciate on all levels.

Let me put the rehearsal process into perspective: Last night there was a scene with Billy and I which begins on page 16 and ends in the middle of page 18. We blocked (laid out, set up) this two page scene for two hours. It took two hours because every time Billy spoke, Mr. Director had another way for him to say his line, or another path for him to walk. I was enjoying this because Julie (me) in this scene is sitting on a bench. So from a safe distance I was able to watch Mr. Director drive Billy crazy by giving him conflicting direction. Needless to say I was rather bored after a while.

The thing I've realized with Mr. Director is you just have to take what he says and to his face, treat it like gospel. "Oh, yes [Mr. Director] that's a great idea, I completely see where you're going with this" and do what he says... word for word. The minute you start to argue, or alert him of the fact that he's giving conflicting direction you have an issue. So, just sit back and take direction... and ignore the fact that he mutters, "actors..." in a very disgusted manner every five minutes.

Two interesting things about Mr. Director: Mr. Director has a Ms. Stage Manager. Ms. Stage Manager sits on the couch and takes notes while we rehearse... blocking notes. Oftentimes Mr. Director stops to give us direction [DUH!] and Ms. Stage Manager will pipe in and try to agree, or reiterate. The hilariousness comes when Mr. Director looks at her and says, "Please." and dismisses her with a wave of his hand. "Please"- pleading with her not to give direction. The look on his face gives everyone, including her, the impression that she's not qualified. If I was Ms. Stage Manager I would be offended by this, hurt, saddened and would surely never make the same mistake again- but I am not Ms. SM and Ms. SM is not me... and time and time again she interjects... and time and time again she is rudely dismissed. I enjoy this interaction between Mr. D and Ms. SM.

The second thing I've noticed is that Mr. D makes incredibly dramatic faces when he watches our scene play out. I can see every emotion that we are supposed to be emitting on his face. When Billy is rude to me [in the scene], Mr. D opens his mouth in SHOCK as though this is the first time he's ever seen the scene. It's like he's watching a very dramatic horror movie, with unpredictable twists and turns. It's almost as though he's trying to be funny. He looks like someone trying to impersonate a very dramatic person- only he's not. I enjoy that he enjoys it so much... watching us every time, like it's the first time.

So far so good with Carousel people. Now that I've written a freaking novel about it... sheesh.

I GOT IT.

We did a full read through of Carousel tonight. I'd never read the script in full... and I ABSOLUTELY LOVED IT. FINALLY I have something to attach myself to, something to care about, something to create a character out of. All hope is not yet lost, I may love musicals as much as I thought I would. Thank you, Carousel. *whew*

"Give it to 'em good, Julie. Give it to 'em good!"

Tonight was my second night of rehearsal for Carousel. Naturally, after my rather horrific audition experience I have been hesitant at rehearsals. Last night went well. As a cast we went over all of the group numbers in the show. After the Oklahoma! matinee I was dead tired and standing on my feet and singing for three hours was the last thing I wanted to do... but with that said, Mr. Director was not unkind.

Tonight was a rehearsal for all of the girls, myself, and the other lead, Carrie. Sometimes I wonder what the hell Rodgers and Hammerstein were thinking. In some of my songs I feel as though they ran out of ideas and stuck some lyrics into the song to finish it up. For a girl who loves moving music by the musical geniuses Stephen Sondheim and Jason Robert Brown ... R&H is a little hokey. To their credit, however, the musicals most well known song "You'll Never Walk Alone" is quite heart wrenching and has almost brought me to tears several times (which is completely beneficial to me since I am sobbing throughout the song anyway...).

Tonight I was early to rehearsal just to be sure that Mr. Director has no cause to yell or scream at me. Because I was so early it was only Mr. Director, Beth (a woman from the cast) and I sitting at the table. Beth and Mr. Director have been friends for 30+ years. I watched them sit and talk about previous shows they've done together and try and recount all of the hilarity. In watching them I realized that there's nothing to be afraid of. Mr. Director is just another human being. The ridiculous things he says can be taken in and then let go, just as easy as anything else.

Standing in front of the piano, score in hand, frantically attempting to read my music, I was absolutely thrilled that I accepted the part in the show. For now, everything is good.

Carousel

I've begun to make a name playing the Rogers and Hammerstein lead ingenue type. A cast member from Oklahoma! reffered me to another theater company in town (very cool) and last week I went and auditioned. The director ended up giving me the lead that night. I should be stoked... but the director is kind of a jerka complete jerk. Most of the people I've talked to about it bring up the point that if I want to do this as a career I am going to have to deal with stupid directors... so despite my completely unsettling feeling... I took the part. If nothing else, it's another show to add to my resume.




In other news... I am thinking maybe I want to do film instead of theatre. *GASP* I know, I know. For the longest time I have absolutely trashed film. HH and I went to see The Women (so good) the other day and I thought to myself, "Gee, they look like they're having a blast...maybe I want to do that"... then we watched the making of Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist and again I thought, "Shoot, I wanna do that." So there you have it. My thoughts are now venturing into the land of film... where they have never ventured before.

On an almost completely different note... It might be cool to be a history major? I really dig my Euro. in Western Civ. class. I mostly love when we briefly discuss US history. I freaking love American History. But what would one do with such a degree? Teach? Ew.