Different Names For The Same Thing

She called it love. More specifically she called it "falling in love". It was where she wanted to be. He was who she wanted to be with. ZE, GG, KK, MC- they all fit the mold, they all held her tight, they all filled the void. Each time it was different. Each time was more serious than the time before- more real and yet the thoughts that accompanied the moments that followed were more imaginary and more deluded than they had ever been. Each boy like a new coat of paint, covering up the old and unwanted color. Every day, though, the new paint would chip... leaving her with the same sad wall she had begun with. And because absence makes the heart grow fonder, she loved that wall, and every time it felt like she was seeing it for the first time. She was seeing HE for the first time, all over again. It is in these small and candid moments, when she saw him again, that she remembered the way she felt crawling back through the window at 4am, knowing that nothing was more perfect than HE. Remembered the way he sheltered her from January rain and not yet knowing how he would shelter her from the rain that came in all seasons of her life. It these moments she remembered what the new coat of paint had helped her to forget. It wasn't until much later that she realized that no matter how many coats of paint she put on the wall- it would always be there.